Cruise the coast of Somalia.

Vacation getaway, This is funny.

You will need to book this vacation as soon as possible as not only is ammo hard to find but im afraid we might run out of pirates once word gets out.

A Somali cruise package that departs from Sawakin ( In the Sudan) and docks at Bagamoya (Tanzania)

The cruise company is encouraging people to bring their high powered weapons along, If you don't have weapons you can rent them right there on the cruise ship. They claim to have a master gunsmith on board and will host reloading parties every afternoon. The cruise lasts from 4-8 days and nights and costs a maximum of $3200 per person double occupancy (4days).

The ship itinerary is to sail up and down the coast of Somalia waiting to get hijacked by pirates, Here are some of the package details:

$800 per day double occupancy.

M-16 full auto rental $25.00/day ammo at 100 rounds of 5.56 Armour piercing ammo at $15.95.

AK-47 rifle at no charge. ammo at 100 rounds of 7.62 com block ball ammo at $14.95.

Barrett 20M-107 .50 caliber sniper rifle rental $55.00/day ammo at 25 rounds 50 caliber Armour piercing at $9.95.

Crew members can double as spotters for $30 per hour (spotting scope included).

RPG's are $75.00 each and $200.00 for 3 loads.

Everyone gets use of complimentary night vision equipment and coffee and snacks on the top deck from 7pm - 6am .

Meals are not included.

"MOUNTED MINI GUN AVAILABLE @ $450.00 per 30 seconds of sustained fire"

They even offer a partial money back if not satisfied... Heres some text from the ad.

"We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or we will refund back half your monry including gun rental charges and any unused ammo (mini gun charges not included).. How can we guarantee you will experience a hijacking? We operate at 5 knots within 12 miles of the coast of Somalia. If an attempted hijacking does not occur we will turn the boat around and cruise by at 2.04 knots. We will repeat this for up to 8 days making 3 passes a day along the entire length of Somalia. At night the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off at intervals and loud music beamed shore side to attract attention. Reserve your package before may 29th, 2009 and get 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice.

Here are a few testimonials:

"I got 3 confirmed kills on my last trip. I'll never hunt big game in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in Schindlers list!"

"Six attacks in 4 days was more than i expected. I bagged three pirates and my 12 year old son sank 2 rowboats with the minigun. Well worth the trip. Just make sure your spotter speaks english"

"Like ducks in a barrel. They turned the ship around and we saw them bleed and cry in the water like little girls. Saw one wounded pirate by sharks- This is a must do cruise"

"I havent had this much fun since flying choppers in NAM. Dont worry about getting shot by pirates as they never even got close to the ship with those weapons they use and their shitty aim"